Recently we began a new parent group. When I left the hospital with bubs I was given the number for the local healthcare clinic. I made an appointment for the nurse to do a weeks 1-4 checkup on bubs. At this checkup I was given the details about the local Parent Group that I was being assigned to. Beforehand I received a message with the details to remind me.
I was so anxious before the first one because my previous mums group (with my daughter) was a bit of a roller-coaster of an experience. Walking to the first parent group my nerves were through the roof so they say. I was super anxious. But once I sat down and the first mums arrived I began to realise I had nothing to be nervous about.
Tips to help relieve nerves:
Have some questions/ topics in mind before you go. If you are like me, new experiences can be very daunting, and I usually stumble over my words when I haven't thought about what I am going to say beforehand. Having some conversation starters or questions in mind can always help.
Be Prepared. Have your nappy bag, clothes etc. pre packed and ready to go. That makes the travelling to the group a lot easier. Especially if you are nervous.
Take along some snacks Something I was always taught is to never come along empty handed. Bringing some biscuits or chocolates is always a good way to relieve nerves in the room. Its a conversation starter of "would you like a...."
Remind yourself why you are there.Mums groups or parent groups are made for a reason. You can ask questions, gain insights to behaviour or support on issues you are having with sleeping/ feeding or any other problem. Remind yourself that you are all there for the same reason.
Try not to compare yourself to others. This is always easier said than done but try and remember that everyone (even babies!) move at a different pace.
Drink lots of water! Seems silly to say but when I am nervous drinking lots of water seems to help me. It keeps my head clear and especially when I am nervous it keeps my mouth from going dry.
Try and use the mums names when speaking to them. I always found by using a person's name in a sentence when I am talking to them always helps me to remember their name. A tip I learned from working in hospitality. Such as "Yes, Jane I do think that." etc.
Have a piece of paper and pen to write down mums names and details. This is something I would suggest you do, unless the group have already done it. I got the mums details so that I could add them on facebook or contact them during the week when parent group isn't on. This also helps keep communication open.
Our parent group has been running for almost a month now. We have met outside the arranged parent group time, too. We are slowly getting to know each other and the babies too.
Meeting a group of mums and bubs for the first time seems really daunting, but the experience can be rewarding in so many ways. The support and guidance you can get from the group can empower you as a mum for life.
But also remember if it isn't working out there are always ways of finding the right group for you. It's not a permanent thing. This was the mistake I made with my daughter. The group wasn't working and I didn't take the time to find another one. (Though I am still in contact with a few of the ladies from the group!)
Being a mum isn't a one person job. We need to stick together!
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